Today was a day for resting, reading and resting some more. I spent the evening with self blame for company, wondering whether it’s all my fault that we are getting divorced. And as much as my brain tells me we both are equally to blame, my heart tells me otherwise and it chastises me for my part in this. If only I could have avoided it all, maybe we’d still be together. But then, there’s a small voice at the back, trying to be heard, that speaks of his part in this. And I’m left wondering all over again.
I know there’s a light at the end of this tunnel and I can’t hurry to get to that end. I simply have to wait it out, walk this journey and learn from it. But how I wish I was at the end of the tunnel, with light everywhere.
I have to remind myself to take it one day at a time, to feel the feelings I feel and to sit with them and not discard them. I have to remind myself that I am enough. That I am my own person, even if I don’t know who that is right now.
I am enough….
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